Originally posted on Polka Dot Bride September 4th 2008

Wendy Hartigan is the event planner behind Wendy’s Affairs Of The Heart based in Pennsylvania. Wendy is such a sweet and caring blogger! She also writes the lovely blog Bridal Affairs and has joined Polka Dot Groom today to give some handy advice on what to do once you’ve popped the question.

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Photo Courtesy of Michael Regan Photography

OK! You popped the question, she said yes…NOW WHAT?! Well, it isn’t all up to the bride to plan the most important day of your lives. IT’S YOUR WEDDING TOO! Get involved, have fun and help keep the stress level to a minimum! Here are a few tips to help you on your journey:

  1. Go to the vendor meetings as much as you can. I’m sure you don’t care if the linens are ivory or hot pink, or if the flowers are daisies or roses, but your bride will appreciate it if you give an opinion.
  2. The tuxes are your job! Pick them out, make sure your groomsmen get measured and then make sure they pick them up before the morning of the wedding.
  3. Speaking of the groomsmen- you need to buy them a gift.
  4. You did a great job of picking out that diamond, but now you have to pick out a wedding band that she will love just as much- oh and a GIFT for your bride to be given to her while she is getting ready to meet you at the end of that aisle.
  5. Guys!! PLEASE don’t have a bachelor party the night before the wedding. I can’t tell you how many brides I have had ask me to make sure the groom was sober at the wedding.
  6. If you are going to make a toast, it should be at the rehearsal dinner. Your best man should be toasting at the wedding reception. So, get those thank you’s, those sentimental words to your bride and all those anecdotes ready to say the night of the rehearsal.
  7. You are supposed to plan the honeymoon. OK- she wants to go to Fiji! It’s your job to make sure that she feels like she did, even if you go to the shore!
  8. Suggest a planner- even if just for the day. Your bride will love you for giving her a reason to smile and relax on this very special day!!
  9. Start a blog! You would be surprised how many grooms have a wedding blog detailing their own angst about this amazing journey. I love reading them myself. I have worked with many brides, but I love working with the groom too. You bring a totally different perspective to the wedding- one that is just as important as the bride’s.
  10. I know that most couples are paying for the wedding themselves nowadays. But, here is the list of the traditional things a groom pays for:
  • Rings
  • Groomsmen gifts and gift for the bride
  • Bride’s bouquet
  • All the boutonnieres
  • The mother’s flowers
  • The license
  • The officiant
  • The rehearsal dinner is the groom’s family’s party
  • The honeymoon
  • In the Asian and Middle Eastern traditions the groom’s family gives the wedding

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Photo Courtesy of Bill Brokaw Photography

Now that I have given you some food for thought, I will leave you with this– You are starting a new life with a special person. Enjoy the day, enjoy the party, and enjoy the vacation. Then, go home and love and take care of each other. Remember every day how you felt when you saw her at the end of that aisle. Best of Luck to all of you who read this!

Don’t forget to check out Bridal Affairs to see more of Wendy’s tips and tricks!