Dear groomsmen,

Wow!  You scrub up well! Guys always do look fantastic in a suit. I hope you feel as good as you look. But take those sunglasses off. Now. And take your hands out of your pockets. That’s better.

No, we really don’t have time for a quick beer before the ceremony, so put it away. Not near your feet. Away. And your iphone. Turn it to silent, and pass it to one of the guests to look after during the ceremony.

The groom is nervous. He’s really, really nervous. Do you really need to heckle him? Do you really need to tell him over and over again that his bride has changed her mind, that she’s not coming, that there is still time to change his mind? Yes, I know it’s your right as his best mates to tease him. It’s how you show him that you love him. But enough is enough. Spare him. Even if he did it to you.

Ok, we’re ready to go. The music is about to start, so get into position. Stand quite close together. Like good friends, the kind who don’t mind if their shoulders touch. Not hugely touchy-feely, but closer than you would normally. The photographer will thank you for it. They want to take photos of the whole bridal party together – and if you won’t stand close, you won’t fit.

Now, pay attention, ring-bearer! That’s usually you, Best Man. So listen up. Looking after the rings is a big responsibility. Don’t lose them. Don’t leave them lying around. I don’t care if you have been given two boxes. Put them into one box. Now when the celebrant – or the priest asks for the rings, I want you to take a step forward, and stand at about 45 degrees from the groom. Not in front of him  – the photographer, and the guests want to see what is happening. Open the box carefully… Ring boxes have a habit of snapping open, and if you aren’t careful, the rings will fly out, and land on the ground. Now hold them out for a few seconds, before turning the box towards the bride and groom. When there are no more rings in the box, take a step back to where you were. Easy.

Aah! The Kiss. Resist the urge to heckle. Please resist.

Time to head back down the aisle. Let the happy couple get to the end of the aisle. Now take a bridesmaid by the arm. Smile and put your head up and down you go.


Nearly done…. You can relax, soon. But if you are the Best Man or the MC and you are making a speech, please don’t hit the beers. Think of the bride. Remember that there are grandparents listening. Family friends. Parents. They don’t want to hear every sordid bit of dirt you can dish up. They don’t want to hear you slur your words, or watch while you stumble around. Not nice. Be friendly. Be fresh. Be G-Rated.

He’s your best mate. Be his.

These photos of Hinson & Lilian’s November wedding were taken by the delightful Vincent Lai – and all the groomsmen were exceptionally well-behaved!

Ms Gingham says: This just puts a smile on my face. Beautiful words from Robyn who, as a celebrant, has attended so many weddings it’s safe to call her an expert!

Robyn says: “I am quite possibly the happiest marriage celebrant in Sydney! Weddings are my thing! Nothing makes me happier than a really happy couple – every time.”

Read more wise words by Robyn here.