So… what’s with the bouquet toss?
It’s one of those wedding moments everyone seems to recognise. The bride turns, the bouquet flies, someone catches it and the crowd cheers. But where did it actually come from? And do you even need to include it?
That’s what The Traditions Issue is all about. We’re unpacking where traditions began, how they’ve changed, and what to do if the old-school version doesn’t sit quite right. Because if you’re going to include something, it helps to know what you’re saying yes to.
Where did the bouquet toss come from?
Before florals became aesthetic, they were practical. Brides in ancient Rome carried bunches of herbs and flowers to symbolise fertility, protection and fresh beginnings (or, according to some accounts, simply to mask body odour.). Fast forward to the Middle Ages, and things got a little more chaotic. Guests believed touching the bride’s dress or flowers would bring them good luck, so they’d crowd around and try to grab a piece of her as she left the ceremony.
To avoid getting swarmed, brides started throwing their bouquets as a distraction. It worked. Guests went for the flowers and left the dress alone.
By the 1800s, the tradition softened into something closer to what we know today. The bride would toss the bouquet over her shoulder, and whichever single woman caught it was said to be next in line for marriage. It became a playful moment and stuck around in weddings across Australia, the UK and the US.
But it’s not universal. Not all cultures include a bouquet toss and plenty have their own flower traditions, from garlands to headpieces to floral altars.
Photo by Kate Drennan via Ruth & Fraser’s Bright & Beautiful Broome Wedding
Is the bouquet toss still popular today?
These days, it’s a mixed bag. Some couples still love the bouquet toss for what it is: a high-energy moment that gets guests involved and makes for great photos. Others feel it’s outdated, uncomfortable, or simply not reflective of who they are. And that’s completely fair.
You don’t need to follow tradition just because it’s expected. But whether you toss it, hand it to someone special, or hold onto it for yourself, it’s about choosing what feels right for you.
The beauty of traditions is that they only hold power if they mean something to you. So if you love the idea of the bouquet toss, go for it. Pick a song that suits your style, time it for when the energy’s high, and toss with confidence. If it’s not your thing, there are plenty of other ways to make a moment just as joyful and meaningful.
Want to keep the bouquet toss? Here’s how to do it well.
If you’re into it, make it a moment. Choose a bouquet that’s sturdy enough to survive the toss (your florist can even make a mini version just for this). Let your DJ know the plan so they can cue up something fun (or let them know your song choice ahead of time), and give your photographer a heads-up to be ready.
When the time comes, take a breath, turn around, and throw with a smooth, steady arc. Don’t rush it (give your photographer a chance!). Let the energy build. Then watch it fly, laugh at whoever catches it, and enjoy the cheers. It’s meant to be light and joyful, so make it fun!
Photo by Tilly Roberts Photo via Ally & Jack’s Heritage Country Wedding at Yarras Homestead
When does the bouquet toss usually happen?
There’s no official slot for it. Most couples save the bouquet toss for later in the reception, once the formalities are out of the way and the dance floor is buzzing. Others do it straight after cutting the cake, or even earlier in the night when everyone’s still on their feet.
Some couples time it to break up the dancing and keep the energy up. Others treat it as a bit of a finale before heading off into the night.
The short answer? Do it whenever feels natural. Just make sure your photographer and DJ know what’s coming so they’re ready to catch the moment.
Bouquet toss songs that aren’t cringey
Want a fun song for your bouquet toss that you haven’t heard a zillion times before and doesn’t feel completely gendered? First tip: pick something that means something to you and your people. That’s always going to land better than a stock standard track.
- “Love on Top” by Beyoncé
- “I Wanna Dance with Somebody” by Whitney Houston
- “About Damn Time” by Lizzo
- “Dance Monkey” by Tones and I
- “The Time of My Life” by David Cook
- “Dog Days Are Over” by Florence + The Machine
- “You Make My Dreams” by Hall & Oates
- “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough” by Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell
- “You Can’t Hurry Love” by The Supremes
- “Lover (First Dance Remix)” by Taylor Swift
- “Better Together” by Jack Johnson
- “Levitating” by Dua Lipa
- “Woman” by Doja Cat
- “That’s Not My Name” by The Ting Tings
- “Can’t Stop the Feeling!” by Justin Timberlake
Photo by Pepper June via Ching & Iwen’s Charming Cosy Wedding at Three Blue Ducks
Want an alternative to the bouquet toss?
Not feeling the toss? You’ve got options. Some couples rework the tradition, others replace it completely. Here are a few ways to make the moment your own.
Invite everyone
Open it up beyond single women. Invite all your guests to join in. It makes the moment more fun, more inclusive, and a lot less awkward.
Hand it to someone special
Rather than tossing your bouquet into the crowd, give it directly to someone who means the world to you. Your mum, your nan, your best friend, or someone who supported you through it all.
Preserve the bouquet
Love your flowers too much to throw them? Press them, dry them, or turn them into something you can keep. A keepsake that holds your day forever.
Split the bouquet
Ask your florist to design a bouquet that comes apart easily. Then hand out mini bunches to the people who helped shape your story.
Give everyone a flower
Let the moment become one of connection. Walk the room or dance floor, offering a flower to each guest as a thank you.
Donate your flowers
When the night winds down, send your blooms somewhere they’ll keep bringing joy. A hospice, a hospital, a care home. It’s a gesture full of heart.
Try an anniversary dance
Want something more meaningful? Invite all the couples to the floor and slowly eliminate them by how long they’ve been married. The last ones dancing get your bouquet.
Gift it to the next to marry
Know someone who’s planning their own wedding? Pass your bouquet on to them with a few kind words and a whole lot of love.
Toss something else
If you want the moment but not toss the actual bouquet, swap it out. Throw a plush toy, a ribboned memento, or even a paper plane with a note (or a voucher) inside.
Skip it entirely
No rule says you have to replace the toss. If the whole thing feels off, just leave it out and keep the party going.
Header Photo by Kate Drennan via Ruth & Fraser’s Bright & Beautiful Broome Wedding
Join the conversation